I was watching a show the other day, and the star of the show went to an anger management class. The coach, while trying to teach her how to properly channel her anger also said that “anger is a secondary emotion”. He said that we need to identify the primary emotion for why we are angry, so we can deal with it properly.
Are you easily angered? Does your anger go away or does it usually stay? The scripture say, “in your anger, do not sin”. How can we sin when we are just angry? Calm down, Paul. You are exaggerating!
But it makes sense because when we are angry at someone, we tend to attack the person and say all the nasty adjectives, nouns and verbs we can possibly recite. We even come up with names or identifiers- “that douche bag”, “that cold hearted snake”, and stuff only sailors can say, lol.
We attack them physically, psychologically or emotionally because we are inept and unaware that the underlying reason for why we are angry is not because they are “good-for-nothing-scumbags”, but because we are hurt, threatened, insecure and vulnerable. Some people find it hard to admit that they are hurt. They toughen it up and out. The more they do, the more anger builds up… it’s just a matter of time and they explode like an A-bomb.
So, maybe the birds are angry because they are tired of flying? Or maybe they are tired of chirping? Or maybe they envy the pigs for being cute and stout? I don’t know. All I know now is, when I get angry I will check first my inner me and ask “why are you so angry?”
Next time we are angry, let’s say “what’s my primary?”.
And while you do that, check this out, too. 🙂 Thank You.